Koi in the water.

It is warm. Warm and safe and so very still. I've been trying to still my mind. Yet despite the cluttered room full of thought and apprehension I see when I close my eyes, I feel still. My mind feels calm, I know that there is a window in the room of apprehension. I walk to it, Over boxes of ill-will and brokenness, I lean to look out the window and below it is a pool of water. A pond with mud and silt. It is perfectly round and there are ripples gliding trhough the water from the center. The water is cloudy, cloudy, cloudy and dim. And I smile. I smile because I know I will wait. I will wait and watch the water and it will become still. It will settle. It will become clear. I don't know why I even watch the water. Whatever is in the pond I wait to see, I do not care to see. I am just smiling to know that the water will become clear.
Leaning over the clutter, my back aches. It is an odd position. I do not need to see the water. I already know it will become clear. The ripples are soothing. I know the pond is empty, But I do hope there is one day a koi in the pool. It would please me. Such serene beings.