Something about that feeling

As the Haze settles in and I fall again into that killer routine... I wonder what it's like for the Christmas carol singing bubbly creature stationed at the desk across from me. We all show up competing with one another on some level. Who is the most important, who has the best clothes, who just got laid. And me. I'm jealous. They seem so alive, so busy, so... unhappy. Where did I go wrong? I want to be part of the group. I'm stuck here on my side of the desk, lonely, out of the loop and miserable. What's worse the droning monotony has left me numb. I'm dropping into a haze again. I can't quite break free from the clutches of this ... this... this ... Life!
But who needs living anyway. Living is Hell.