Friends above all else.
I must admit, I think you're the only one who would ever get it.
Most men say they would, give 'em time. Eventually, they forget what it means to be friends and start expecting a relationship to serve them first. You're different, I'd wager. You know what it means to give up on what you think, what you want, whatever it is you think you know is yours. I think because you've realized that in a relationship, friends or otherwise, nothing of theirs is yours, nothing of yours is theirs.
Well maybe there are material posessions that swap from time to time, a shared toothbrush, a cigarette between friends, but that's the point - friends ask, share and don't presume. You've never presumed anything of me. Well you did that once, you presumably thought I was going to stay with you forever. I couldn't let us end like that - not with the fighting and the whimpering that most relationships end with. No, I ended it, I hurt you not on purpose, but to preserve what we had. The friendship.
Don't get me wrong...
I have had every intention - throughout the time I've known you - to keep you in my life, to be loyal to you. Honestly; to get you to tell me what it is you want from me. You really are the typical man, and I tell you this only because I know you can handle it - you never come out and say what it is you want. Or maybe that's the typical woman... hrm...
All the same I really do think you're the best person I've ever known and I know what I want from you. I like when you call me your wife, I want you to do that more often, I want to live with you. I want to get your life straightened out, and see you happy. I want you to hold me at night. I want to hold you every night from now on.
I want to give you your freedom...
I mean it, and I know that sounds backwards... I want to keep you, I want to let you be free... but I mean it. I want you to be happy, I want to be the one who makes you happy (gosh I hope I do.) I want you to never have to do something you don't want to do because of me.
Of course the problem is that you never seem to want to say what it is you want or want to do.
So there's a monkey wrench in the works... so what?! At least we're finally talking after all that.
I must admit, I think you're the only one who would ever get it.
Most men say they would, give 'em time. Eventually, they forget what it means to be friends and start expecting a relationship to serve them first. You're different, I'd wager. You know what it means to give up on what you think, what you want, whatever it is you think you know is yours. I think because you've realized that in a relationship, friends or otherwise, nothing of theirs is yours, nothing of yours is theirs.
Well maybe there are material posessions that swap from time to time, a shared toothbrush, a cigarette between friends, but that's the point - friends ask, share and don't presume. You've never presumed anything of me. Well you did that once, you presumably thought I was going to stay with you forever. I couldn't let us end like that - not with the fighting and the whimpering that most relationships end with. No, I ended it, I hurt you not on purpose, but to preserve what we had. The friendship.
Don't get me wrong...
I have had every intention - throughout the time I've known you - to keep you in my life, to be loyal to you. Honestly; to get you to tell me what it is you want from me. You really are the typical man, and I tell you this only because I know you can handle it - you never come out and say what it is you want. Or maybe that's the typical woman... hrm...
All the same I really do think you're the best person I've ever known and I know what I want from you. I like when you call me your wife, I want you to do that more often, I want to live with you. I want to get your life straightened out, and see you happy. I want you to hold me at night. I want to hold you every night from now on.
I want to give you your freedom...
I mean it, and I know that sounds backwards... I want to keep you, I want to let you be free... but I mean it. I want you to be happy, I want to be the one who makes you happy (gosh I hope I do.) I want you to never have to do something you don't want to do because of me.
Of course the problem is that you never seem to want to say what it is you want or want to do.
So there's a monkey wrench in the works... so what?! At least we're finally talking after all that.
posted by Shannon Hollender @ 6:07 AM
1 Comments:
At 1:45 AM,
Anonymous said…
$It saddens me that I had to find out like this.... that you want the friend and as you said I only presumed one thing and now you end it . I wish we were what we think we are and not what we really are, I mean individually. You are right... friends above all else and that I will always be. I do get it, you just do not see it at times. I have and will always give up on what i think, want or think i know. But I thought wrong. i thought there was something we each had of each others and maybe that is why this all happens.I thought thear was one thing that we gave of ourselves to each other. And by doing so we would undersand each other better. I never presumed but once... i did presume it was forever. Now is it time for you to end it? To preserve our friendship which is above all else. I am typical but I want to say what i want but i am afraid to, afraid it will push you from me, that i will appear weak and needy.I wish you would tell me what you want.... to tell me what you like ... to tell me and not just when it is hard but when things are great or hectic. You make me happy... you really do ... but i do a lot of things i do not want to because i do not want to upset you or seem uncaring... i get confused... i get confused alot and i want your happiness aove all... maybe that is why i push so... i fear of making you sad ...i only want the best for you and i hate to see things you do or things that happen sadden you ... i want to try and make sure you are happy but it seems it only backfires. So i want your happiness above all and have a hard time thinking what little bit of happinees i give you is going to be enough... i do not talk because i am afraid of you.
Post a Comment
<< Home